I just have to share this. It is definitely a change from my usual blog postings, but I just had to address it. I so wish I would have had some of this insight twenty years ago.
And for those of you husbands who might be reading, if you have any love at all for your wife, please read on.
For years, my husband has loved me through a roller coaster of hormones that may have sent a lesser man packing. For some reason, this girl has had issues regarding estrogen and progesterone and their wild, wild ride that most times hasn't seemed quite fair.
I listened to these messages this morning and cried. It is so important to relate and know that someone understands. Maybe most importantly that it is not my imagination.
PMS is truly a physical issue that is used as a spiritual battleground. We cannot afford to take it lightly and dismiss it. Especially when it is such a real and relevant issue, or maybe it would be better described as a clear and present danger. :o)
Please, take the time to listen to this. There are two messages available, and both are amazing. They are also on iTunes as a podcast titled "The Hormone Swing." It will change the way you think.
If you've struggled in this area and can relate please comment here on the blog. I'm thinking this might be a topic worth discussing further...
A poem by the author of the book I'm reading called, "Jump off the Hormone Swing," Lorraine Pintus:
The Crowd that is Me
Within this body live many women
There's one that is holy, and one that is sinnin'.
One woman sings loudly with lots of praises
Another spreads fear for the rage that she raises.
One wife is gracious, selfless and kind
Another is toxic and out of her mind.
One mother is gracious and stunningly wise
Another is foolish even in her own eyes.
The woman that emerges depends on one thing
The nature of her hormones and the height of her swing.
I'm running late for work, so I'm going to have to come back and listen to the messages, but I just wanted to comment while I was here. I've had "mood swings" since I was a teenager. Over the course of 20 years I went through 10 therapists, and at least 5 diagnoses ranging from depression to bipolar disorder. Everyone around me (including me) felt I should just snap out of it. It was frustrating. It wasn't until I started undergoing fertility treatments that we noticed a pattern and realized that the same thing that was causing my infertility was also causing my mood swings. Once we started to get my estrogen and progesterone levels balanced there was a huge improvement in both my mood swings and my fertility.
ReplyDeleteYup! I believe it! I so wish everyone could educate themselves about why we feel the way we do. It's a very tricky subject both for those living it and those trying to live with those living it!
ReplyDeleteThank you for commenting! ;o)
Oh, I so need to hear more of this. I only had time so far to listen to the first message. This has become more of a problem for me the last few years. Some months I don't even know who/what has taken over my body. I say and do things I never want to but it's almost like I can't help myself. I so feel like Paul's words when he talks about doing what I don't want to do and not doing what I do want to do. Of course, pills are always suggested, but I really don't want to go that route. I so want to do something to not feel that way. I'm 39 and have a ways to go before this is over. I'll listen to the other message hopefully this weekend. thanks for opening this discussion, Melissa
ReplyDeleteMelissa,
ReplyDeleteI bought her book on my Kindle app so I could read it right away. It is excellent. It helps more than I can say to know that there's a REASON I feel the way I sometimes do. I never want it thought of as an excuse for my behavior, but on the flip-side, to know it's not in my imagination feels like such a relief!
I, too, am more than a little leery of the pill route. The book does give some real ideas to at least take the edge off.
Thank you so much for sharing. We are not alone!
Thank you for sharing about this topic. For some reason, it's considered "taboo" and too personal to discuss, but many of us women deal with it.
ReplyDeleteMy mother had horrible mood swings when I was a child that didn't stop until she had a full hysterectomy at age 40. As children, there were times when we were terrified of her. She could be so warm and funny and fun...but then the next week, we would be afraid to make eye contact with her. I knew that when I grew up, I didn't want to be like that. I didn't want my family to hide from me.
Over the last few years, I've found a trick that has worked for me. I realize that this won't work for everyone, but it's what has worked for me. I've started paying more attention to my feelings. When I look back at my day and realize that I've been irritable that day, I try to figure out why. Did my husband REALLY do something so bad? Were my children REALLY the most obnoxious kids ever? If the answer is no (and it hasn't been yes yet!), then I know that MY hormones are to blame, not my family.
For some reason, just making that connection is enough to keep myself in check. For the rest of that hormone wave, I'm able to remind myself that it's not about them, it's about me and I can control my behavior and my tongue.
I realize that I am a pretty introspective person, so I know that not everyone will be able to do this...but it is what works for me. As a matter of fact, my husband can't even tell anymore when I have PMS!
Wow, Misty! That is awesome that you have found a way to deal effectively with how you are feeling.
ReplyDeleteI wish I could say I was that successful! Unfortunately, there are just some times when I have had to retreat because I was no good to anyone, and because of that I would beat myself up for being such a "failure."
In this book by Lorraine, I felt like not only was I given permission to retreat, but that I did less damage all around when I just took some time to myself. Granted, it takes a husband who says, "Take the time you need," and that is not always possible or available. When my kids were little there was simply not time to recover on my own. Now, I'm just getting the idea.
I agree, this just needs to get talked about. It makes me wonder how many of us had mothers with real hormonal problems and none of us knew what was really going on!
After much research, I have also begun taking better vitamins (including lots of calcium and vitamin D) and have already noticed some improvement!